


This is Gonna Be a Thing Now, Isn't It

by Cimorene105



Series: Thank God for PR [1]
Category: Captain America (Movies)
Genre: Alternate Universe - Canon Divergence, Bisexual Steve Rogers, Bucky is thanked for his service, Bucky uses therapy, By Bucky, Excessive Swearing, Love Confessions, M/M, Original Character(s), Self-Hatred, like he deserves, obviously
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-11-02
Updated: 2017-11-02
Packaged: 2019-01-28 09:23:26
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,515
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/12603428
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Cimorene105/pseuds/Cimorene105
Summary: After the craziness of Civil War had died down, Bucky attended regular and varied therapy while Steve and Tony mostly communicated through a frustrated Pepper. Steve was miraculously persuaded to do some PR repair. Bucky agreed instantly, confiding in Pepper that he'd take whatever he was given. The first stop for the pair was an interview on live TV. They couldn't have possibly predicted how much shit would go down when they arrived.Subscribe to the series to be notified when I add new works in it!





	This is Gonna Be a Thing Now, Isn't It

After the craziness of Civil War had died down, Bucky attended regular and varied therapy while Steve and Tony mostly communicated through a frustrated Pepper. Steve was miraculously persuaded to do some PR repair. Bucky agreed instantly, confiding in Pepper that he'd take whatever he was given. The first stop for the pair was an interview on live TV. They couldn't have possibly predicted how much shit would go down when they arrived.

After initial one-on-one interviews that felt more like gossip to the two, and which they assumed was just to get them comfortable in the new situation, both men sat down with the host. The count-down to live video began the session.

"Welcome back to the show, everyone. I'm your host, Chuck." It was clear from his gesticulating that the host was excited for the interview. "Man, oh, man, have I got a treat for you. Here with me, live in the studio, are none other than Captain Steve Rogers and Sergeant James 'Bucky' Barnes. These men are infamously known now by more popular titles, but I quite like the sound of 'Steve' and 'Bucky.' Would it be alright with you gentlemen to address you this way?"

After receiving the affirmative from both guests, the host transitioned into the interview.

"I have to say, it's amazing to have you here with me today. There are so many things I'd personally like to thank you both for, but I have even more questions. I think the viewers would get bored if I chose the first option for the show today, so I've prepared the top couple of questions I've always dreamed of asking you. Incidentally, this is directly taken from my middle school history paper." He paused for the live audience to laugh at the humor.

As the host opened his mouth to continue, Bucky spoke up.

"I have a preliminary question first, if you don't mind." The man's eyebrows were knit intimidatingly on his forehead.

"Not at all, Bucky. Ask away."

"Chuck, you said there's a lot to thank us for. I'm just a bit confused about why I'm included in that sentiment. You obviously know who I am, so...?" Bucky hesitated, wondering how to tactfully remind the viewers he was here to start atoning for his sins.

"I'm glad you asked that, Sergeant Barnes, because my first question is all for you. I promise we don't have to get too deep into this if it's a painful subject." Chuck paused to make sure the brunet was with him. It soon became apparent that the ex-Sergeant wasn't the one to seek approval from.

"How deep are we talking, here? You don't have any sensitive information, do you?" Steve had surged forward in his seat, the very picture of Captain America in street clothes. It was clear he would defend his friend from any threat, even if the other person was joking around. It reminded Bucky of the Steve that would pick a fight with every bully he crossed, regardless of his sickly, underweight demeanor.

"I don't have that kind of clearance, Steve. Anything I talk about today will be common knowledge to the public," the host was quick to pacify.

Bucky refrained from rolling his eyes at Steve. He reminded himself Steve had every right to be protective. Bucky had promised himself in therapy he'd remember that when things like this happened.

Once Steve had settled back down, Chuck continued, addressing Bucky again.

"Bucky, we've had a segment on this show recently, extolling the virtues and exploring the backgrounds of the Howling Commandos. We thought it fitting to start it with Steve and end it with you." So far, Bucky was with him. He'd watched all the segments and absorbed any information his brain hadn't yet filled in for him.

"As the audience will remember from my commentary, you've always been a hero to me, even more than Captain America or the other Commandos. You came from a background that some would call painfully average." Chuck paused for the laughter.

"Many people can identify with that. Today's examples might include broke college students." More laughter ensued.

"Then you made a name for yourself - before Steve joined you in the field. You were already the best and most decorated sniper in the 107th by the time you went across enemy lines and were first captured as a POW. So I'll say again, now that I have you here, thank you for your service to this country. You helped make it possible for us to get to this point." Chuck finally took a breath while the audience applauded.

Bucky wasn't sure how to respond. He didn't think he should be thanked for the origin of his current and only skill set.

"So now, my first question for you, Bucky: When you finally broke your programming as the Winter Soldier, you could have done a number of things. What was your plan in going to Romania and staying there peacefully until Captain Rogers found you?" The host leaned forward in his seat, an earnest and pleading look on his face.

"You want the truth?" came the soft response.

"Absolutely. The honest-to-God truth."

The air in the studio was tight with tension. Bucky could feel Steve's intense stare from his right and tried to ignore it. This was about coming clean.

Bucky took a deep breath, held it, and released it, as he'd learned in therapy. "The honest-to-God truth is that I was trying to hide long enough to remember who I was, to avoid being captured and wiped again, and to stay out of the news until I knew what I wanted to do."

He took another measured breath and let it out on a laugh. "We all know how well that turned out. I was doing just fine until this guy," Bucky jabbed a thumb at Steve, "turned up and brought a fight with him. 'Why was I not surprised,' might be your follow-up question."

Steve made an indignant sound. "Hey, no fair."

Bucky turned to the blond, a disbelieving smirk on his face. "'No fair,' huh, Steve? Are you sure about that? You are always bringing me into fights, one after a-fucking-nother. Who always drags your ass out of the fire in those fights, huh? And what happens when I'm not there to do it?"

Steve looked incredibly sheepish at this point.

"You throw yourself on a fucking grenade - yeah, I heard about that; don't think you'll get away with that shit around me - or you plant a plane in the ocean to give up on life. And what is it about jumping out of planes without a parachute that seems like a good idea? Huh, pal?" Bucky took a moment to calm down as Steve gave a tiny, "Sorry, Buck."

"Anyway, this got pretty far away from your original point, Chuck. Sorry about that. What's your next question?"

After some awkward laughter all around, the host moved on. He asked questions to bring the guests out of their shells, he asked about the Avengers and saving the world, and he asked about the Sokovia Accords. This gave Steve the opportunity to vent, also. He was finally able to give his moral reasons for disregarding the Accords, regardless of Bucky's involvement. It felt good to get it off his chest.

"My last question is actually one that I had a colleague ask you separately, earlier, before the show began. Let's take a peek. Bucky, we'll look at your footage first."

On the screen behind the men appeared the one-on-one conversation between Bucky and a female interviewer.

The interviewer and Bucky traded a few jokes before her expression turned apologetic.

"I have to ask you," she said, looking like she wished it wasn't her job to ask, "life-long friendship and all that; sacrificing your lives for each other, etcetera - are you two... You know - a thing?"

On-screen Bucky gave a bark of laughter as the Bucky in the studio groaned.

"I wish," on-screen Bucky said, betraying live Bucky.

Steve whipped around to face Bucky, who couldn't see this, as his face was buried in his hands.

"I mean, have you seen Steve Rogers? He may be a punk, but he's always been perfect. You know?" continued the condemning, recorded voice.

"Oh my god," Steve wheezed. Whenever he did something like that, it reminded Bucky of the asthma he used to have. He resisted the urge to say, "Breathe, Steve," but only just.

"Are you fucking kidding me right now?" Steve couldn't process this.

Bucky didn't dare look at his best friend. He didn't even look up when he heard the interviewer repeat her question.

The wistful sigh following it wasn't enough, either.

What really caught Bucky's attention was the voice of his best friend saying, "I wish. Have you met Bucky Barnes? He can be charming and sarcastic at the same time - it's a special talent of his. He's so kind and patient. Did you know, he'll still sit for hours to let me draw him?"

The video paused.

Bucky stared blankly up at the screen.

After a moment, without looking away from Steve's paused, bashful face, Bucky asked, "Can you rewind that? Is there a remote?"

Chuck laughed and handed a remote to the brunet.

Steve tried to say something, but Bucky didn't even look while shushing him with a finger to the lips.

"No talking during the dialogue, Steve."

Bucky rewound the footage. It was Steve's turn to bury his face in his hands while he heard himself repeat, "I wish. Have you met Bucky Barnes?" over and over.

After a while, the sound cut off.

Steve peeked between his fingers at Bucky. The man's arms were crossed, but his expression was impossible to fathom.

Chuck cleared his throat. Both men turned to look at him and the audience quieted from their fervor.

Chuck reached over to Bucky, who handed him the remote. Chuck held up a finger, pausing for dramatic effect. He pressed the play button and the two continued talking, one line from each cut together for their next statements.

Bucky started, "I can't believe it's been seventy years-"

"It doesn't seem like seventy years to me -" Steve reiterated.

"-and I'm still in love with my best friend," Bucky continued.

Steve interjected, "-but I'm still following him around like a lovesick puppy."

The two appeared together in a split-screen frame to finish simultaneously, "Pretty lame, right?"

Pandemonium erupted in the studio as the live audience gave their loud approval or disapproval. Bucky and Steve didn't register either response. They stared at each other like each had grown a second head.

Chuck quieted the audience and turned back to the dumbstruck guests to address the reason for adding the question.

"As soon as the shock of 'Oh my god, we get to host Steve and Bucky' wore off, we at the studio thought to ourselves, 'We have to ask. There's no way they don't realize they look like an old married couple.'" He turned back to the camera to say, "Just so you know, we'll be calling this episode 'Marriage Counseling for Super-Soldiers.'"

The audience laughed and the host looked back to the aforementioned Super-Soldiers. Neither had moved a muscle. Chuck cleared his throat. "So, thoughts, guys?"

Bucky spoke first, in fits and starts. "I can't believe - I can't fucking believe you, Steve."

At that, Steve's wondrous expression turned to shock. "Me? You can't believe me? I thought you were straight! All those double-dates you dragged me on? Come on, man!"

At this, Bucky doubled over in a burst of laughter. "It was the only way I could ask you on a date back then. And for the record, you went on every single one! I thought you were straight."

"Oh my god," Steve repeated, hiding his red face again. He flung his hands wide and shouted, "I only went because it was the closest I'd ever get to going on a date with you!"

The next minute was an uproar of voices from everyone present.

Ecstatic, Chuck turned to the camera and crowed triumphantly, "Just to make it crystal clear, Sergeant James Barnes and Captain Steve Rogers have just revealed to us and each other that they were, for all intents and purposes, going on regular dates together before they were drafted and - in Steve's case - finally accepted to fight in the war."

Chuck turned back to the two guests, who were shouting over each other to be heard.

"Drafted? You were drafted? You told me you signed up! Why would you lie like that?"

"I don't know - maybe to keep some punk from realizing I didn't fucking want anything to do with the war he was obsessed with? I didn't want to disappoint you, Steve!"

Chuck also shouted to be heard. "Hey, HEY. Guys!" The studio quieted. "Thank you. It's fascinating to get this insight into your lives from before the war. I do want to get us back on track, though. Speaking of your sexualities, which you mentioned earlier, maybe it would be better to get it on record what you both identify as. If you feel comfortable answering, would you please both tell us your sexuality?"

"I'm bisexual," Steve piped up immediately. "But for most of my life, I thought I was just Bucky-sexual." He giggled.

"Oh my god. Fucking- this is gonna be a thing now, isn't it? It's going to be a thing for you to embarrass me on television. It fucking is. Why do I put up with you?" Bucky pleaded his case to the heavens.

"Because you love me, apparently," Steve wheedled.

Bucky sighed. "I was right. This is going to be a thing," he muttered to himself. To the host, Bucky said, "While I respect Steve's identity and sexuality, I feel like naming my own will put me in a box. Why should I put myself in a box? I've had enough of being put in boxes." He paused for the unexpected applause.

A mischievous gleam appeared in Bucky's eye. "I can say with some conviction, though, that the one constant in my life has been my one true love; the light of my life-"

"Aw, Buck."

"-DumDum Dougan."

"Buck!"

"I gotta get back at you somehow, Steve! Cos this is gonna be a thing; I just know it." Bucky poked Steve hard in the chest. "We're gonna go on other TV shows where they'll ask us about each other and you'll embarrass me every time. I'm taking my victories where I can."

With the raucous laughter of the audience in the background, Chuck thanked the two for coming in and being so open. "That's all we have for you today, folks! Maybe we'll have them back again sometime. For now, tune in same time, same channel for more of the show. I'm your host Chuck, signing off. Thank you for watching!"

Pepper turned off the TV and turned to the frozen man on the couch next to her. "Remind me not to let them do any more shows together, Tony."

"Yes, dear."

**Author's Note:**

> [My YouTube Channel](https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCnTcO921RLNZVxTYOWVq5Lg)  
>  Lookie what I did!


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